My Story
Can I take you on a journey for a bit?
When I was 12, I decided that if I could starve myself, then I would always be in control of everything. The mental mastery that came with not eating made me feel invincible, like nothing could touch me. In a weird and twisted way, it taught me how to survive. It was the beginning of a vicious cycle that followed me for more than a decade.
Eight years later, age 20, I got addicted to crystal meth. I remember looking into the mirror and not recognising the person I was looking at. My skin was grey and dull, haven't slept in days, and my irregular heartbeat was starting to bother me. I told myself that if I didn't stop, I would probably die soon.
The same willpower that I developed through not eating actually saved me. I quit cold turkey and never looked back.
Five years later, age 25. I left Singapore and moved to Amsterdam to start a new life with a cute, gold-hearted Aussie boy I met. Life was pretty damn good, but a part of me was still quietly spiralling in my dysfunctional relationship with food and body dysmorphia.
From 25 to 30, I cycled through every existing diet & biohacking protocol out there in the name of "health". It left me confused, exhausted and bloated. I was constantly running the hamster wheel of restrictions.
Veggies only, dairy is bad,
Eating clean, I don't eat that
Cut this out, now eat more fat
Zero carbs, no sugar
Gluten is inflammatory
How to get into ketosis
Butter in my coffee, what about paleo
Skip breakfast, fast for three days.
What. Am. I. Doing. Wrong.
There was so much noise in my head. It was pure insanity.
I was often hungry, never truly satiated, and on edge, and I could not stop thinking about what I was going to eat next. The truth was I didn't really know how to be with food without the element of control & restriction. It was all I had known for so long.
Over the last three years, I have begun to slowly dismantle my pervasive beliefs and peel back the layers of control & restriction. And above all, I gave myself permission to eat. Healing my relationship with food was a portal for my liberation. I can proudly say that I am fully recovered from the dogma. I trust my body; I have no fears around food, my dairy and gluten intolerances have vanished, I know my hunger cues, and I know when I'm full. My relationship with food has been neutralised, and I am finally at ease.
Today I am 33, and I have never felt more free, more connected and more vital in my body. I nourish her. I move her. I celebrate her with all my heart, and I want the same for You. As I am writing my book—Vision of Vitality—the lessons I've accumulated over what feels like multiple lifetimes ago are pouring out of my Soul, and before I go, I just want you to know that…
You are so worthy of the vibrant health you are looking for—that natural radiance and grace. You are so worthy of the love, the healing, the bliss. You are worthy of Vitality and all that it brings.
I believe so.
Do you?